THE WAY YOU ARE

Irina and Stephen

Like any young woman I was searching for great love, for the second part of my heart and soul. Though I never had problems getting a man’s attention, I was  not fortunate enough to meet the man with whom I would be willing to spend the rest of my life making him happy and being happy myself. One day it seemed to me that I had found the happiness and love that my heart was searching for with a man from Ukraine.  But in a while our relationship had changed for the worse.  I don’t know why but he made up his mind that I had too many demerits. He tried to change me so he would be happy and comfortable with me … even though I had the same character, merits and demerits I did at the very beginning of our dating!

 We soon broke up because I was and am sure that  love is to hear : “I love you just the way you are” and not “You should change yourself because you have too many demerits”.

People in Ukraine usually get married at the age of 20-25. And all of them are happy that they have found each other, they believe their love and happiness will last until the end of their days but those wonderful feelings they have only at the beginning. Some time later the “undying” love disappears .. I was trying to understand why our Ukrainian men are unable to make women happy, why first they can say loving heart-felt words, present flowers and gifts but in a while instead of flowers and “I love you” women receive only affronts and rude attitudes.

I have friends that married foreign men. From their letters I knew that they had a wonderful and happy family, they were surrounded by tenderness, love and respect. Knowing this put the idea into my head - I decided to post my information to a service that matched women from my country to foreign men. In a couple of months I received the first letter from a 35 year old man from the US. After I read it I realized how big the difference was between Ukrainian and American men. He called me and sent letters many, many times during each week. And I had a feeling that I would be unable to live without him. To be honest I didn’t think before that it was possible to love man without having met him in person yet. But I changed my mind because I always looked forward to his calling just so I could hear his lovely voice, to tell him that I missed very much. Then on Valentine’s Day, just 2 months after receiving his first letter, I received the most beautiful roses I had ever seen in my life and a stuffed teddy bear, my heart melted with happiness. It was such a big surprise for me. I knew that I had found the second part of my heart and soul! I have been in love with the man who lived so far from me. We corresponded for 9 months then he came to visit me in Sumy. It was wonderful and we spent a lot of time alone and with my family. When he was to leave we both knew that we would be together soon and always. And now I am sure distance does not matter if a man and woman love each other and desire to create happy family.

Now Stephen is my husband and I am the happiest woman in the world. Every morning I wake up next to my lovely husband and my heart is full of love and happiness. I have been living here in US for 6 months already and I every day I just get happier. Sure I miss my family, my friends, my town, but my life here with beloved and the most wonderful man in the world is great. I don’t regret anything. And I wish every woman was so much happy as I am.

 The original letter is published with insignificant stylistic editing. You can send your comments to Natasha@russianwomenabroad.com or discuss it at our Forum.